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Matt realises it has been five years since the last blog post

After a fight on their honeymoon in 2012, Matt and Bec had decided to start a blog so they had a project to work on together. It was going to be a ‘relationship building’ exercise. This was when blogs were still a thing, before TikTok reduced the attention span of the average internet user to […]

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Molly Granfield, not feeling well

Matt and Bec are up all night on their ‘babymoon’

With five weeks to go until the birth of their first child, Matt and Bec decided to head to the coast for a long weekend of time out together before the little one arrived. Matt was vocal about it being a ‘babymoon’ – with the idea that it contain a similar amount of romance as […]

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Bec and her rather large bump

Things that go baby bump in the night…

Matt: It’s 3am and you’ve been rolling around for two hours. What’s going on? The bed hasn’t seen this much action since our wedding night. Bec: I’ve got news for you if you think the bed has ever seen two hours of action. Matt: Well, some of us are trying to sleep. I’m sure the […]

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Vintage anxiety drugs

Things Bec has worried about since finding out she’s pregnant

That the guy in the pet supplies store whose breath smelled like cigarettes would give the baby lung cancer. That the baby was hurt when the Woolworths truck backed out too quickly and gave Bec a fright. That the baby was seriously injured when Bec had a facial and the lady at the beauty salon […]

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Baby

The Granfields find out they are having a baby

20 Weeks Ago… Bec: So, I think I’m ovulating… Matt: OK Darling. I’ve just got to finish watering the grapes. They’re getting a bit dry and I’ve finally got the length of the septic tank overflow pipe right so it reaches the furthest vine. There’s some poo and stuff about the place, but it’s good […]

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Best Of...

Bec and her rather large bump

Things that go baby bump in the night…

Matt: It’s 3am and you’ve been rolling around for two hours. What’s going on? The bed hasn’t seen this much action since our wedding night. Bec: I’ve got news for you if you think the bed has ever seen two hours of action. Matt: Well, some of us are trying to sleep. I’m sure the […]

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A bench seat

How to build a bench seat: Part One

Matt: Let’s buy a boat! Bec: We live 200km from the sea. Matt: … Bec: We’re not buying a boat. Matt: What about our dream of buying a yacht and sailing it home from The Mediterranean Sea? Bec: What are you talking about? Matt: I told you this the other day. Our retirement plan. We […]

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Matt Granfield on the land

Matt reveals he is a bona-fide bushie: Interview by Bec

The vineyard’s progress had stalled, so Matt had fewer things to do on the weekend. After nearly 12 months in the country, Bec decided now was an opportune time to test his real rural mettle. Bec: Which famous bushman are you most like, and why? Matt: Well to start, the word is bushie. You’re obviously […]

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Council Bins

Twelve Indisputable Facts of Life

Nobody knows whether it is actually recycling bin night. One person on the street takes a chance and the rest follow their lead. The average supermarket avocado has been squeezed by 427 other customers before you buy it. If your question to your husband begins with “have you seen my…” you’ll only ever get two […]

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A rifle

Bec and Matt welcome a new arrival…

Matt: I’ve got a surprise for you darling! Bec: You’ve learnt how to budget? Matt: I picked up my gun today! I’ve got it right here. Want to see it? Bec: Get that thing out of the house! I don’t want to see it. I don’t want to know where it is. Store it somewhere […]

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Sea World

The secrets of Sea World in the off season

Chick on entrance booth: That’ll be a hundred and sixty dollars Matt: Oh, sorry, I think you’ve misunderstood, I didn’t want to pay for the busload of Japanese tourists who are standing over there in the car park next to the bus. It’s just me and Rebecca here. Chick on entrance booth: Yes, it’s eighty […]

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A limping chicken

How to cure a limping chicken. Axe not included.

Their chicken had been limping for some time, but never this bad. She’d already had one trip to the vet. The vet had given them some anti-inflammatory medication, which was administered orally via syringe. The used syringes had lain discarded around the house in various cupboards, much to the consternation of enquiring mothers and fathers […]

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Love languages

The Five (or so) Love Languages

Bec: You never listen to me. Matt: I do listen to you. Bec: I always talk about the five love languages. What are they? Matt: You want me to name the five languages? Bec: Yes, recite them. Matt: Gift-giving is one. Bec: Yes. Matt: Touch is one. Bec: Yes, well, physical touch, but OK, that’s […]

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Poison apple

Rebecca’s Ten Worst Case Scenario Thoughts

Rebecca is generally speaking, an optimistic, positive person. She smiles a lot and is, for the better part, lovely to be around. However, she does tend to worry more than most, and in any given situation will naturally gravitate to the worst possible case scenario. Here, revealed for the first time ever, are 10 of […]

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