How to blow a baby’s nose (i.e. How to clear snot out of a baby’s nose)

Snot sucking results

A few weeks in and the baby is breathing like a 90-year-old man. It’s all huffing, puffing and blowing the house down. Exactly the way you’d huff and puff if you’d been living in dry, air-conditioned air your entire life and no one had told you how to blow your nose. As it turns out, babies can’t blow their nose. This was a problem we never anticipated.

Some Google searches revealed a few nasal aspirator solutions. Most of them looked like something you’d baste a turkey with.

Figure A. One of these is a Turkey baster, one is a baby nasal aspirator. Can you pick the difference?

Turkey Baster turkey-baster-or-nose-sucker

The product with the best reviews was a Swedish solution named the Nosefrida. Heck, they even have 3,000 followers on Twitter, that’s a lot of fans for a snotsucker. You could buy one for $15.95, or a pack of 30 for $220. It looks like this:


It looked like a good idea, but the baby’s nose was blocked now and we didn’t want to wait a few days for delivery. To be honest, it looked just like a biro and a filter with a tube on the end. It could be that hard to make at home.

So we got a biro, emptied the pen bits out, put a double-wrapped layer of muslin cloth on the widest end, put the narrow end in bub’s nose, sucked, and, hey presto: booger central.

Snot sucking results
Snot sucking results

Is it hygenic? Seems to be. The snot doesn’t get too far up the pen. The cloth is there as a backstop but no gunk got anywhere near the wrong end.

Did baby like it? Erm. No. Not during the sucking process, but afterwards he was breathing easy again.

Did it work? A treat.

Has our biro pen snot sucking solution been approved by the medical profession in a series of robust trials? No.

Are we going to keep giving it a go until our doctor says no? Yes.

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